After 45 years as a GP, Dr Robert Favaloro ponders on what it takes to build a wonderful life. How happiness can be grown and tended like a good crop. It's all about following The Rules of Life.
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The words of Rule 15 are attributed to Mahatma Gandhi.
A young girl, Anna, presented to me in an anxiety state. In counselling she admitted to being especially fearful of her dad's anger and verbal aggression. We discussed the options that she had to handle this father that she loved.
Our first agreement was that he wasn't likely to change if confronted with any anger. Anna accepted the concept that violence is a cover up for fear. Her father had migrated on his own to Australia. She felt that her dad was lonely for his siblings and his mum.
The change that she most wanted was for her dad to be less angry and more loving.
Another patient was an ex-soldier with post traumatic stress disorder. He was haunted by disturbing thoughts related to his role in conflicts, and sleeping for him was a problem.
He however, was a different man in the company of his small daughter. Her unconditional love broke through his anger. Again, its hard to fight love.
Thoreau the philosopher felt that the mass of men lived lives of quiet desperation.
Rule 4 was 'Fear Nothing'. An extension of this is the idea that we can handle any problem that comes our way. Just believing this takes away the desperation that is so easy to adopt when confronting life's problems.
Dale Carnegie gave that famous quote - 'Do the thing you fear to do and keep on doing it...that is the quickest and surest way ever yet discovered to conquer fear'.
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